Wars and Windmills

18 February 2009

One Picture and One Song II

Lover Boy -- Billy Ocean


  1. Mark Clements1:00 PM

    I'm surprised you would go with this hackneyed pastiche of Pachelbel's Canon in D a la keytar (a few half steps down at the end isn't fooling anyone). Sorry to shatter your dreams and deny you access to my car, but just because Billy Ocean's hair was a different color than his goatee before it was cool and he happened to shat out a few gold bricks the likes of "Carribean Queen," "Suddenly," and "License to Chill," doesn't make up for fathering "When the Going Gets Tough, the Tough Get Going" (although the producers of the Jewel of the Nile in their infinite wisdom apparently disagreed with me) along with the rest of his insufferable discography. Frankly I'm disappointed you didn't go with any one of the many magnum opi of Hugh Anthony Cregg III and his news.

  2. Mark, you are a far better judge of music it seems than I, so I will render unto you what is yours and not argue.

    All I have to say in defense is that Lover Boy is a catchy piece of kitsch. Nostalgia is what drives my love of this song, nostalgia, and lines like "fingers on the trigger, you're the one I desire", coupled with the charming preprogrammed keyboard vocal track that spits out 'lover' when pressed making for a great lo-lo-lov-love-lover-lover-lo-lo-love-lover effect. sweet. this song encapsulates all that i love about the 80s popular music scene: campy lyrics, canned beats, and flashes of neon. I can taste the production.

    Overall, you are correct; B.O. is no Hugh Anthony Cregg III, but I am no Mark Clements.

  3. Mark Clements3:20 PM

    Bravo. A very adept and handy defense of Lover Boy I must say. I would have to agree with your lo-lo-lov-love-lover-lover-lo-lo-love-lover point. In general, the "machine made to talk like human" technique is far superior to the "human made to talk like machine" technique... damn you Peter Frampton.

    My previous post was more a product of boredom and a predilection for "Hip To Be Square" than absolute vitriol for Billy Ocean because let's face it, B.O. is a surgeon with synthesized slap bass in "Caribbean Queen." I like to think that "Carribean Queen" is what "Thriller" would have sounded like if it was meant to be a love ballad rather than a love ballad for flesh eating zombies.

  4. Mark Clements4:39 PM

    Ok. I confess. I only listened to the song you posted for 10 o 15 seconds before jumping to my "Pachelbel's Canon in D comment." I've discovered since that is comment is unfounded I retract it. I went back to sample the goodness of the lo-lo-lov-love-loves-love synth and realized that for some strange reason, when I clicked on the link before this is NOT the song I heard. Either something was screwy with the player or is was coming through another window I had open. Either way, I know I head a Herbie Hancockish rendition of Canon in D. In my defense, though... EXCUSE me for not committing the intro to Lover Boy to memory. Upon a second listen I recognized the Invisible Touch-esq intro and it all came back to me.

  5. Awesome.

    What else can I say. Keep the nostalgia posts coming mate. Sorry you caught poop about the beard. I think it is quite becoming.

  6. I'm at work, so tragically, tragically, I can't listen to the song. But, I think I can almost intuitively hear it just by looking at the picture.

  7. This song is one giant jambalaya of horrible 80' movies. Seriously, I think they took stock of every 80’s pop music blueprint and stirred them wantonly into the mix of this song.

    If you hit the demo song button from 42 keyboards manufactured in 1987 and mashed them together—it would create this song.

    I ain't mad at 'em.